Evil Cards and More by Flytrap

Evil Cards and More

Honestly, some of the stuff in our store even makes our own hair hurt. Here are our most evil cards and whatnot for those times when you want to hit something but are better off laughing. If you're looking for humorous evil, you've come to the right place.

Greeting Card CSW-G010 Funny Christmas Greeting Card, "Santa Eats Babies" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I used to wonder why Santa is so fat. INSIDE Until I realized, he probably just eats all the kids who scream.	Greeting Card CAT-H006 Funny Hair Card, Paper Greeting, Sarcastic, "Mullets” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #2. INSIDE Mullets.	Greeting Card CAT-H007 Funny Cats Card, Paper Greeting, "Woman With Too Many Cats” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #3. INSIDE One woman, 42 cats.	Greeting Card CAT-H008 Fun Diet Card or Food "Hello" Card, "Big Mac & Diet Coke” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #4. INSIDE Big Mac, large fries, sundae, diet soda.
Greeting Card CAT-H009 Funny Dog Card, Friendship Card, "Dogs Shouldn't Wear Sweaters” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #5. INSIDE Dogs covered in fur. Then covered with sweaters.	Greeting Card CAT-H011 Hello Card, Funny and Sarcastic, "Nobody Cares What You Think” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Rude awakening #1. INSIDE Nobody cares what you think.	Greeting Card CAT-H012 Funny Facebook Card, Friendship, "Everyone is Hiding You on Facebook” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Rude Awakening #2. INSIDE Everyone is hiding you on Facebook.	Greeting Card CAT-H014 Hello Card, Funny, Sarcastic, Personal Space, "Don't Hug Me” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT If you hug me right now… INSIDE You'll come back with two bloody stumps.
Greeting Card CAT-H015 Funny Coffee Card, Hello Card, "Coffee Smells Good, You Don't” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Doesn't fresh coffee smell great in the morning? INSIDE I wish you did.	Greeting Card CAT-H023 Funny Hello Card, Sarcastic, "Hope You Don't Get Hit By a Bus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Hello! Hope you have a wonderful day today! INSIDE Or, at least, that you don't get hit by a bus or something.	Greeting Card CAT-M002 Humorous Card for Mom's Birthday or Mother's Day, "Junk Food” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Mom, I'd like to thank you for all the Spaghetti-Os and Mac-n-Cheese meals you made me over the years. INSIDE I must have really meant a lot to you.	Greeting Card CAT-P001 Religion Mean Card, Funny, Sarcastic, Atheist, "Jesus Loves You” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Jesus loves you. INSIDE Just not like your priest does.
Greeting Card CBD-B001 Belated Birthday Card, Funny, Snarky, "You're Not Important” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm sorry I forgot your birthday. INSIDE I'm even more sorry that you're not important enough to remember on time.	Greeting Card CBD-E002 Funny Happy Birthday Card, "Get Over Yourself, Everyone Has One” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Birthdays come but once per year! INSIDE But everyone has one, so get over yourself.	Greeting Card CBD-E004 Humorous Birthday Greetings Card, "Another Year Older Than Me” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday! Here's to another year… INSIDE … older than me. Sucks to be you.	Greeting Card CBD-E009 Funny Birthday Greeting Card, Adult, Sarcastic, "Exciting Birthday” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I hope you have an exciting birthday! INSIDE But I know how hard that is for an old person.
Greeting Card CBD-E011 Strange Happy Birthday Card, Sarcastic, "I Give You Breath Mints” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'd like to wish for eternal bliss and world peace on your birthday. INSIDE Of course, I'd be happy if you just started using breath mints.	Greeting Card CBD-E016 Humorous Birthday Card, "Wine Gets Better With Age, People Don't” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Wine gets better with age… INSIDE People don't.	Greeting Card CBD-E017 Hilarious Birthday Card, Evil, "Could This Be Your Last?” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday! INSIDE Could this one be your last?	Greeting Card CLV-H001 Funny I Love You Card, "I'm Glad I Found You Instead Of Jesus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm so glad I found you. INSIDE Instead of Jesus.
Greeting Card COC-B004 Funny New Baby Congratulations Card for Grandparents, "Share Diapers” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Congratulations on becoming a grandparent. INSIDE Now you have someone to share diapers with!	Greeting Card COE-W001 Funny Wedding Card for Wife, "Please Don't Get Fat” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT For my darling bride… INSIDE Please don't get fat.	Greeting Card COE-W003 Humorous Wedding Greeting Card for Groom, "This Card is a Lie” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT You're so lucky to have her as your bride! INSIDE (The front of this card was a lie. She's crazy, dude. Abort! Abort!)	Greeting Card COT-K005 Funny Thank You Note, Mean, "Thanks for Nothing” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Thank you. I really appreciate what you did. INSIDE Which was a whole lot of nothing.
Greeting Card CSP-E005 Funny Easter Card for Friend - Sarcastic, "That Pesky Jesus Dude” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Easter! Here's hoping the Easter Bunny carves an egg and candy path straight to your door. INSIDE Even if he has to shove that pesky Jesus dude out of the way.	Greeting Card CSP-M009 Funny Sarcastic Mother's Day Card, "I'm A Better Mom” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Mother's Day, Mom! You're the best mom ever! INSIDE Next to me, that is. Everyone knows I'm better at it.	Greeting Card CSW-C006 Sarcastic, Mean Christmas Card, "Gain Weight for Santa” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I really appreciate your commitment to the Christmas spirit! INSIDE Not many people would put on that much weight just to look like Santa.	Greeting Card CSW-H003 Funny, Naughty Hanukkah Holiday Card, "Thanks for Killing Jesus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Hanukkah! INSIDE Thanks for killing Jesus!
Greeting Card CSW-V011 Funny Naughty Valentine Card, "For My Lover (Not My Partner)” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT A Valentine card for the person I really, truly love. I wish I had found you before I was committed to someone else. Click for more... INSIDE Oops, sorry. I think I gave this to the wrong person…	Sticky Notes NSN-X017 Funny Sticky Notes for Office, Work or Home, "Do Not Eat My Poison Food" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 Perfect sticky notes for your lunch bag at work or even to ward off roommates. They read: Warning: Do Not Eat. This food is not yours. It's mine. If you eat it, you will... [click for more]	Sticky Notes NSN-X018 Funny Fake Parking Ticket Sticky Notes for Drivers, "You Park Like An Idiot" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 THESE NOTES SAY You Park Like An Idiot. Remember: You actually share earth with other people. [click for more]

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