Hilarious Cards and More by Flytrap

Hilarious Cards and More

We crack ourselves up. Enjoy these terrifically hilarious greeting cards and other paper goods when you need to make someone double over and snort liquid from his nose. You'll find birthday cards, Christmas cards, sticky notes and tons of other hilarious stuff to get your friends laughing hysterically.

Greeting Card CSW-G010 Funny Christmas Greeting Card, "Santa Eats Babies" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I used to wonder why Santa is so fat. INSIDE Until I realized, he probably just eats all the kids who scream.	Greeting Card CAT-H002 Funny Friendship Card, Adult, "8 Inches Makes a Difference” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Survive crash. Die. INSIDE Sometimes 8 inches makes a huge difference. Sometimes, not so much.	Greeting Card CAT-H019 Adult Friendship Card, Funny, "How I Attract Powerful Men” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT What do I put behind my ears to attract rich, powerful men? INSIDE My legs.	Greeting Card CAT-H021 Funny Friendship Card, Hello Card "Unique Means Weird” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT You're so unique! INSIDE Unique means weird.
Greeting Card CAT-H024 Sarcastic Friendship Card, Funny "Friends Are Precious” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Friends are precious! INSIDE Especially when they're teeny little pink and green giraffes.	Greeting Card CAT-H023 Funny Hello Card, Sarcastic, "Hope You Don't Get Hit By a Bus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Hello! Hope you have a wonderful day today! INSIDE Or, at least, that you don't get hit by a bus or something.	Greeting Card CBD-E008 Humorous Birthday Card for Adult, "Inappropriate for 8-Year-Olds” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Bad: Sex, drugs, lobster, driving fast. Good: Ice cream, hot dogs, climbing trees, playing with little kids. INSIDE Oh, that's right. You're not 8 anymore. Reverse the lists.	Greeting Card CBD-E014 Humorous Birthday Greeting Card for Woman, "Do Something You Love” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday. I hope you do something you truly love today. INSIDE Eh. Even if you don't love him.
Greeting Card CBD-E031 Hilariously Funny Birthday Card, Sarcastic, "Your Personalities” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT We all want to wish you a happy birthday! So... Happy Birthday! INSIDE Love, Your Personalities	Greeting Card CBD-L003 Sexy Love Birthday Card for Man, Husband, Boyfriend, "Birthdays Suck” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Birthdays suck... INSIDE Fortunately, so do I. Happy Birthday.	Greeting Card CLV-H001 Funny I Love You Card, "I'm Glad I Found You Instead Of Jesus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm so glad I found you. INSIDE Instead of Jesus.	Greeting Card CLV-H008 Adult Love Card, Funny, "Whoring Around” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm so glad we're in a committed relationship now. INSIDE I was getting tired of whoring around.
Greeting Card CLV-H015 Funny Love Card, "Love Isn't Easy, But I Am” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Love isn't easy... INSIDE Fortunately, I am.	Greeting Card CLV-H016 Hilarious Love Greeting Card, "Less Farting” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I don't know where I'd be if I hadn't found you, my love. INSIDE But I'm betting there'd be a lot less farting.	Greeting Card CLV-S001 Funny Love and Sex Card, "Long Term Love, Short Term Sex” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT My Love, for the long term, I want to love you, hold you, adore you, please you, take care of you, and make you the happiest person who ever was. INSIDE For the short term, I just want you to do me.	Greeting Card CLV-S004 Sexy Love Card, Funny and Popular, "Why Are You Wearing Clothes?” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I love you. You are everything I want in a partner… Click for naughty letter. INSIDE Why are you still wearing clothes?
Greeting Card COE-G001 Funny Congratulations Card for New Graduate, "Workisms” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT A list of workplace jargon that makes people want to shove ice picks in their ears. Click for more. INSIDE Congratulations, graduate. Welcome to your new vocabulary.	Greeting Card COE-R001 Funny Congratulations on Your Retirement Card, "Retirement and Death” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT You've been looking forward to your retirement for over 30 years and now it's finally here! Congratulations! INSIDE Now all you have to look forward to is dying.	Greeting Card COT-K006 Funny and Unique Blank Thank You Card, "Thank You For Not” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Thank you for not. Thank you for not being as annoying as a baby on an airplane. Thank you for not being a writer who publishes incriminating stories about friends and family. Thank you for not being a mouth breather. And many more... just click. INSIDE [blank]	Greeting Card CSP-E004 Funny, Sarcastic Unique Easter Card, "The Ghost of Jesus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT On the third morning, Jesus rose from the dead to show us the path to eternal life. INSIDE And everyone wondered why he wasn't wearing a sheet with eyeholes while humming "boo".
Greeting Card CSP-M007 Hilarious, Naughty Child Mother's Day Card, "Dad Pokes Mom” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Mom, this Mother's Day I want to send a special thank you for bringing me into this world. INSIDE And to dad, for wanting to poke you that night.	Greeting Card CSU-F003 Naughty, Funny Father's Day Card from Adult, "Mom Puts Out” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Dad, this Father's Day I want to send a special thank you for bringing me into this world. INSIDE And to mom for putting out that night.	Greeting Card CSW-C004 Humorous Christmas Card with Modern Reindeer, "Who's Jesus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy reindeer, Santa, mistletoe, lots of presents, too much food, chocolate, and candy cane day! INSIDE Who's Jesus?	Greeting Card CSW-C011 Funny Christmas Greeting Card, "What Santa Leaves Behind” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT The joy of the season lies in what Santa leaves behind. INSIDE Including the long white pubic hair I found under the tree.
Greeting Card CSW-G002 Funny, Modern Holiday Greeting Card, "Politically Correct” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT A politically correct diatribe. View product for complete text. INSIDE [blank]	Greeting Card CSW-G008 Hilarious Holiday Greetings Card, "Bragging Rights" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT A rambling, bragging holiday letter. Click to read. INSIDE [blank]	Greeting Card CSW-V007 Naughty, Funny Adult Valentine's Day Card, "I Don't Want Candy” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I don't want candy, jewels or a rose, Or fancy cards with romantic prose. All that stuff I can get on my own, There is only one thing I can't do alone. So pucker up sweetie and give it a go... INSIDE My pussy can't lick itself you know!	Greeting Card CSW-V012 Funny, Naughty Valentine's Day Card, "That's Sex You're Smelling” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Love is in the air! INSIDE Yep, that's sex you're smelling. Happy Valentine's Day.
Little Mini Notes LLN-L004 12 Dirty Funny Love Notes for Him, "Reasons to Do Me” Quantity Retail Price: $12.00 Twelve hilarious mini cards for your spouses and lovers. Including, " I'll spray perfume down there so it's nice for you. " And " I'll be on top. You can just lay there if you want. " Click product details for more.	Sticky Notes NSN-X007 Odd, Funny Sticky Notes, "I Am Very Important" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 THESE NOTES SAY I Am Very Important. Seriously, it's not just my ego talking. I really matter.	Sticky Notes NSN-X009 Funny Sticky Notes for Home, Husband, Family, "I Am Not Your Servant" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 A funny set of sticky notes with a humorous list of things for people in your home to do, like clean up their rooms or empty the dishwasher. Click for more.	Sticky Notes NSN-X010 Funny Adult Sticky Notes for Home or Office, "No Love, No Pony" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 THESE NOTES SAY My parents never loved me enough to give me a pony.
Sticky Notes NSN-X017 Funny Sticky Notes for Office, Work or Home, "Do Not Eat My Poison Food" Quantity Retail Price: $5.00 Perfect sticky notes for your lunch bag at work or even to ward off roommates. They read: Warning: Do Not Eat. This food is not yours. It's mine. If you eat it, you will... [click for more]

Upcoming Holidays	Stuff You Always Need
Valentine’s Day » Easter » Passover »	Birthday Cards » Love & Sex Cards » Friendship Cards » Hello Cards » Thank You Cards » Anniversary Cards »	New Baby or Parent Cards » Congratulations Cards » Graduation Cards » Wedding & Marriage Cards » Other Occasion Cards »

Family »	Friends »	Lovers »	Anyone »
Mom. Dad. Mother. Father. Grandma. Grandpa. Brother. Sister. Sibling. Husband. Wife. Spouse. Aunt. Uncle. Cousin. Nephew. Niece.	Good Friend. Crappy Friend. Work Friend. School Friends Old Friend. New Friend. Best Friend. Friend with Benefits.	Husband. Wife. Partner. Boyfriend. Girlfriend. Fiance. Mistress. Mister. Lover. Friend with Benefits. Sex Slave.	Coworker. Colleague. People You Don't Know So Well. Kids. Children. Pets That Can Read. Sick People. Bereaved People.

Stalk Us. We like it.	Contact Us	About Flytrap	Customer Service	Stores
Great deals & steals.	Flytrap, llc 191 University Pkwy #209 Denver, CO 80206 Toll Free: (855) SHOP FLY (303) 773-0087 hello@shopflytrap.com	Who Are These People? Contact Us Press	How We Do Things FAQs Report a Problem	Store Locator Become a Retailer Suggest a Retailer