Humorous Greeting Cards by Flytrap

Humorous Greeting Cards

Humorous, sarcastic greeting cards are what we do best. So whether you want to say Happy Birthday, Happy Valentine's Day, Merry Christmas, I Love You, or just plain ol' Hello, these humorous cards are a beautiful, tangible way to get your message across. With humor!

Greeting Card CAT-D001 Funny Father Quotes Card, "Dadisms" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things your dad used to say. View product detail for complete text. INSIDE [blank]	Greeting Card CSW-G010 Funny Christmas Greeting Card, "Santa Eats Babies" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I used to wonder why Santa is so fat. INSIDE Until I realized, he probably just eats all the kids who scream.	Greeting Card CAT-H002 Funny Friendship Card, Adult, "8 Inches Makes a Difference” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Survive crash. Die. INSIDE Sometimes 8 inches makes a huge difference. Sometimes, not so much.	Greeting Card CAT-H003 Humorous Friendship Card for Adult, "Lies Men Tell” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I've never cheated. I'll call you. You don't look fat. I'm not married. My grandmother died. I made her come. We did it. She's just a friend. INSIDE Lies men tell.
Greeting Card CAT-H004 Funny Hello Card or Friendship Card, "Lies Women Tell” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT No, really. I'm fine. It looks great on you. Childbirth hurts, but in a good way. It happens to all men. You're not fat. All kids do that. You look like you've lost weight. Yes, I came. I'm usually a size 6. I love giving blow jobs. INSIDE Lies women tell.	Greeting Card CAT-H006 Funny Hair Card, Paper Greeting, Sarcastic, "Mullets” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #2. INSIDE Mullets.	Greeting Card CAT-H007 Funny Cats Card, Paper Greeting, "Woman With Too Many Cats” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #3. INSIDE One woman, 42 cats.	Greeting Card CAT-H008 Fun Diet Card or Food "Hello" Card, "Big Mac & Diet Coke” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #4. INSIDE Big Mac, large fries, sundae, diet soda.
Greeting Card CAT-H009 Funny Dog Card, Friendship Card, "Dogs Shouldn't Wear Sweaters” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things that don't make sense #5. INSIDE Dogs covered in fur. Then covered with sweaters.	Greeting Card CAT-H010 Funny Friendship Card, Mean, Sarcastic, "Stop Crying, Pussy” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I know it's hard, but please stop crying so much. INSIDE Everyone already thinks you're a pussy.	Greeting Card CAT-H011 Hello Card, Funny and Sarcastic, "Nobody Cares What You Think” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Rude awakening #1. INSIDE Nobody cares what you think.	Greeting Card CAT-H012 Funny Facebook Card, Friendship, "Everyone is Hiding You on Facebook” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Rude Awakening #2. INSIDE Everyone is hiding you on Facebook.
Greeting Card CAT-H013 Friendship Card, Funny and Sarcastic, "Friends Until Someone Moves” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Friends like us are friends forever! INSIDE Or until one of us moves.	Greeting Card CAT-H014 Hello Card, Funny, Sarcastic, Personal Space, "Don't Hug Me” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT If you hug me right now… INSIDE You'll come back with two bloody stumps.	Greeting Card CAT-H015 Funny Coffee Card, Hello Card, "Coffee Smells Good, You Don't” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Doesn't fresh coffee smell great in the morning? INSIDE I wish you did.	Greeting Card CAT-H017 Funny Hello Card, Weird, "Birds and Bees and Quickies” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Birds do it… bees do it… INSIDE Let's eat half our body weight and scour the countryside for quickies!
Greeting Card CAT-H019 Adult Friendship Card, Funny, "How I Attract Powerful Men” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT What do I put behind my ears to attract rich, powerful men? INSIDE My legs.	Greeting Card CAT-H020 Funny Friendship Card, Hello Card, "Farting is Liberating” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT There's something I want you to know... INSIDE Farting is liberating.	Greeting Card CAT-H021 Funny Friendship Card, Hello Card "Unique Means Weird” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT You're so unique! INSIDE Unique means weird.	Greeting Card CAT-H025 Hilarious Friendship Card, Sarcastic, "Killing My Boss” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Thank you for always being there for me. INSIDE I know who to call when I end up in prison for killing my boss.
Greeting Card CAT-H026 Hello Card, Funny and Sarcastic, "You're Like Family” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT You're like family to me. INSIDE Without all the criticism and yelling.	Greeting Card CAT-H024 Sarcastic Friendship Card, Funny "Friends Are Precious” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Friends are precious! INSIDE Especially when they're teeny little pink and green giraffes.	Greeting Card CAT-H023 Funny Hello Card, Sarcastic, "Hope You Don't Get Hit By a Bus” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Hello! Hope you have a wonderful day today! INSIDE Or, at least, that you don't get hit by a bus or something.	Greeting Card COE-W006 Funny Blank Wedding Card for Bride and Groom, "What Couples Say” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Thank you for always being there for me. INSIDE [blank]
Greeting Card CAT-M001 Mom Card, Funny, for Birthday, Mother's Day, "Momisms” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Things your mom used to say. View product detail for complete text. INSIDE [blank]	Greeting Card CAT-M002 Humorous Card for Mom's Birthday or Mother's Day, "Junk Food” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Mom, I'd like to thank you for all the Spaghetti-Os and Mac-n-Cheese meals you made me over the years. INSIDE I must have really meant a lot to you.	Greeting Card CAT-P001 Religion Mean Card, Funny, Sarcastic, Atheist, "Jesus Loves You” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Jesus loves you. INSIDE Just not like your priest does.	Greeting Card CBD-B001 Belated Birthday Card, Funny, Snarky, "You're Not Important” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm sorry I forgot your birthday. INSIDE I'm even more sorry that you're not important enough to remember on time.
Greeting Card CBD-D001 Funny Birthday Card for Dad, "Best or Worst Dad Ever” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday to the best dad ever! INSIDE Or maybe you're the worst dad ever. I wouldn't know. I have no other point of reference.	Greeting Card CBD-E001 Happy Birthday Card, Funny, "With Age Comes Wisdom” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT With age comes wisdom. INSIDE And with wisdom comes the realization that you're actually quite boring.	Greeting Card CBD-E002 Funny Happy Birthday Card, "Get Over Yourself, Everyone Has One” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Birthdays come but once per year! INSIDE But everyone has one, so get over yourself.	Greeting Card CBD-E003 Funny Facebook Card for Birthday, "More Than Writing On Your Wall" Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday. INSIDE I got you this card so you wouldn't bitch at me for only writing on your Facebook wall.
Greeting Card CBD-E004 Humorous Birthday Greetings Card, "Another Year Older Than Me” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday! Here's to another year… INSIDE … older than me. Sucks to be you.	Greeting Card CBD-E005 Funny Birthday Card, Mean, "No Gift for You” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'm sorry I only got you a card for your birthday. INSIDE Not really. You're lucky you got anything.	Greeting Card CBD-E006 Humorous Birthday Card, Sarcastic, "Insignificant Age” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday. INSIDE You've just turned an insignificant age that nobody really cares about.	Greeting Card CBD-E007 Sarcastic Birthday Card, Humorous, "Should I Say More?” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Happy Birthday. INSIDE What? Am I supposed to say something else?
Greeting Card CBD-E008 Humorous Birthday Card for Adult, "Inappropriate for 8-Year-Olds” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT Bad: Sex, drugs, lobster, driving fast. Good: Ice cream, hot dogs, climbing trees, playing with little kids. INSIDE Oh, that's right. You're not 8 anymore. Reverse the lists.	Greeting Card CBD-E009 Funny Birthday Greeting Card, Adult, Sarcastic, "Exciting Birthday” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I hope you have an exciting birthday! INSIDE But I know how hard that is for an old person.	Greeting Card CBD-E010 Humorous Birthday Greetings, Sarcastic, "No Gift Receipt” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I hope you enjoy your present. INSIDE If not, too bad. I forgot to ask for a gift receipt.	Greeting Card CBD-E011 Strange Happy Birthday Card, Sarcastic, "I Give You Breath Mints” Quantity Retail Price: $4.00 FRONT I'd like to wish for eternal bliss and world peace on your birthday. INSIDE Of course, I'd be happy if you just started using breath mints.

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